Iwrestledabearonce To Release ‘A Beary Scary Movie’ On November 6, 2012

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It’s been over year since IWRESTLEDABEARONCE announced they would be releasing “A BEARY SCARY MOVIE”, a feature film starring none other than themselves. Since the reveal, fans of horror and metal alike have been dying to see film and will be happy to know, the wait is nearly over. “A BEARY SCARY MOVIE” is scheduled for release on NOVEMBER 6, 2012. “A BEARY SCARY MOVIE” was written and directed by Justin Beasley of KOTK Productions and features the musical stylings and acting debut of IWRESTLEDABEARONCE. The horror-comedy follows the tale of Shreddy – the deranged guitarist from legendary 80’s hair metal band White Vulture – who comes straight from hell murdering bands one by one by hacking them to pieces. Now it’s up to Steven, Mikey, John, Krysta and Ricky to make it out alive. The film also features an impressive cast including M. Shawn Clown Crahan, Larry Parks, John Dillion, Phillip Wright, Jim Babel, Charlie Huffman and Kelly Keodara, with a special appearance by Jake Busey.


The Rum Diary

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Director: Bruce Robinson
Cast: Johnny Depp, Aaron Eckhart, Giovanni Ribisi

Just so we’re clear, folks: this review is about the movie and not the novel it is based on. That being said, I may reference the book to help clarify my points.

A young reporter is hired to write horoscopes and cover meaningless page-filler stories by a small, failing newspaper in San Juan, Puerto Rico amidst a revolt. That reporter, Paul Kemp (played by Johnny Depp), is a novelist searching for his voice. Usually he searches inside of one bottle of alcohol or another.

Before he has a chance to get his feet wet and come to understand his position at the paper or the culture found in Puerto Rico, Kemp finds himself entangled in a secret plot to capitalize a nearby island. He also falls for the girlfriend of the head of the group plotting to take advantage of the island.

The pacing of the movie is very slow, as was the pacing in the book, but the movie doesn’t have the luxury of a few hundred pages, so when the story starts rolling the movie is already nearing its end. Many great scenes at a local bar which serves only rum and hamburgers have been cut in favor of spicing things up for the big screen.

Aaron Eckhart fills the shoes of the slick and slimy bad guy effortlessly with very little to work with. Johnny Depp tones down his better known Hunter S. Thompson role enough to make it original, but lacks anything deeper than his skin to grasp onto and root for. The story is sparse and hinges on two important story arcs, one is that Kemp loves rum and the other being Kemp’s desire to use his voice at the paper to expose a wrong, so it is understandable that the book was tough to transfer to the screen. How much can you focus on a few reporters drinking at a bar and BSing? That being said, one guy nailed his part in almost eerie perfection: Giovanni Ribisi plays Moberg, an eccentric, doped up drunk who is an off again/on again contributor to the newspaper. His spaced out, awkward portrayal provides comic relief, sobering reality, and an unexpected depth of character.

Book snobs love to tell people to just go read the book because, “It’s way better”. And you know what? I agree in this case. Do yourself a favor: Grab a bottle of rum (or two), go find an empty chair in the sun, and start reading.

The Wolfman

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Director: Joe Johnston
Cast: Benicio Del Toro, Anthony Hopkins
Runtime: 102 minutes
CARA Rating: R for bloody horror violence and gore

The Wolfman movie poster

First off, I liked this movie. It definitely didn’t suck. The over all look was great. Dark, foggy, gloomy, very cool. It has a very classic feel to it. There was a good share of gore, but not over the top, and the CG was used fairly tastefully. Rick Baker did a knock out job with Wolfie’s make-up.

It was an updated version of the original and I thought it looked great. Very bad ass but not cheesy. The story stayed pretty close to the original, which was the intention, but threw some cool twists and a few other things to fatten up the original story. But, one thing I did like that kept akin to the original, is that it started quick and ended quick. There wasn’t a lot of overly dramatic bullshit to slow the film down. I thought the acting was pretty good. Del Toro did a good job as Larry Talbot. He’s not going to win any awards but he fit the part very well. Anthony Hopkins did a good job as well, turning in a typical Anthony Hopkins performance, which for this type of role is perfect. The supporting cast did a fine job as well.

Basically, this was a very good remake. It stayed true to the original and that’s what I was looking for. I’m sure that 70% of the audience have most likely never seen the original and since everybody these days is used to over the top effects, the fact that I didn’t hear any snickering from the younger viewers – because The Wolfman’s “classic” look – I thought was a good sign that it was done well.

Gwar Announces “Needle In A Bloodbath” Guitar Giveaway With Dean Guitars

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GWAR and Dean Guitars are stoked to announce the “Needles in a Bloodbath Contest” What is the “Needles in a Bloodbath Contest”? Here are the details. Fans must take a picture of themselves holding one of the following three items 1) A copy of the new GWAR album Lust in Space, 2) Your concert ticket to one of the GWAR dates on their current US tour, 3) A Dean guitar, better yet take a picture of yourself with all three items. Once you have your picture taken post it as a comment on the Dean Guitars Official MySpace “Bloodbath Contest” blog at Four fans will be “chosen” as grand prize winners and they will be presented with a one of a kind Dean MLX guitar, that has been painted, decorated, desecrated and autographed by GWAR.

GWAR bassist BEEFCAKE THE MIGHTY made the following proclamation about the “Needles in a Bloodbath Contest” “Your Lords and Masters, GWAR, have teamed up with the fine folks at Dean Guitars to bring you the most brutal contest in the history of the Universe! Just follow the instructions (dumbed down for your puny minds) for your chance to win a one of a kind Dean guitar personally signed, defaced, and defiled by GWAR! Good luck, scum!”

GWAR will perform the song “Let Us Slay” on Fearless Music TV this Saturday, November 7. The show will air at 12:30 a.m. on Fox 5 in New York City. If you are not in New York City, check out the time and channel listing at the Fearless Music web site to find out when and where else the program will air. Before and after the episode airs, go to the Fearless Music web site and vote for GWAR! The band that receives the highest amount of votes will be featured again on next week’s episode.

“Let Us Slay”, the new video from GWAR, can be viewed below. The clip was shot in Richmond, Virginia by director David Brodsky (SUICIDE SILENCE, THE BLACK DAHLIA MURDER, WHITECHAPEL) and his MyGoodEye crew.

GWAR’s new album, Lust In Space, sold around 5,000 copies in the United States in its first week of release to debut at position No. 96 on The Billboard 200 chart.

Boot Camp

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Director: Christian Duguay
Cast: Mila Kunis, Peter Stormare, Gregory Smith
Runtime: 99 minutes

What loving mother would sign over the care of her only daughter to a monster like me?
-Dr. Norman Hail (Peter Stormare)


Papillon meets Lord of the Flies in Boot Camp, a self-styled thriller about the tough love movement and its effect on the children that are thrust into it.

Sophie (Mila Kunis) is the troubled teen who has yet to come to grips with the death of her father or her mother’s remarriage. Lashing out at her family and embarking on a self-destructive path her stepfather signs her up for A.S.A.P., a tough love camp that promises rehabilitation for troubled youths in a serene tropical setting but delivers something else entirely. The children are beaten and abused, malnourished, brainwashed and eventually set against each other as the only way to “advance” up through the ranks and prove their rehabilitation. Ben (Gregory Smith) is Sophie’s boyfriend who refuses to write Sophie off the way her family has, endeavoring to find her and eventually getting himself sent off to the same camp by his parents. Dr. Hail (Peter Stormare) runs the camp with a monomaniacal zeal with the help of his “enforcer”, an Army deserter who apparently is there because Dr. Hail has leverage on him but takes to his activities with his own ruthless determination, routinely forcing girls to exchange sex for advancement and eventual release.

Boot Camp has a powerful tale to tell but reaches too far and tends to ask too much of the viewer. While many parents have relegated their children to boot camps such as Dr. Hail’s, this camp goes the extra step of seizing and handcuffing the children, dragging them off and sending them to an island for as long as two years with no communication from their families. Ben, desperate to find a way to be with Sophie, is apparently able to convince his parents to take this drastic step after a few weeks – claiming that he was depressed and turned to drugs when his girlfriend broke up with him. Wooden performances and shallow characters don’t do much to help suspend the disbelief.

The movie is meant to be an indictment of the parents who would subject their children to these measures instead of just doing their jobs as parents, with Sophie’s mother painted in passing as the villain for letting her new husband dictate what Sophie needs and Dr. Hail making a fleeting attempt at convincing the parents of the children in his care that they brought this on themselves. As the children rise up against their oppressors in the end, they are the ones who develop a conscience and refuse to be what their parents seemed to think they were, seemingly making them all innocent victims all along.

Boot Camp bills itself as an action/thriller movie, but plays best when viewed as a docudrama on the boot camp/tough love movement and the “parents” who choose that over doing their jobs as parents – the ones who truly deserve the boot.


Boot Camp

Rating by Larry McCloskey: 2.5 stars

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